Experiment To Take Away Cars
Ends Badly
A federal pilot program in New Hampshire has backfired, leaving thousands of innocent civilians dead or rendered in a horrific catatonic state.
The Clean Streets Project was administered in Chesire county with a focus on the rapid removal of automobiles from society. The catastrophic results and details are not fully known, but all accounts point to a federal cover-up on par with that of the infamous Area 51 in the state of Nevada.
What is known is approximately 47,000 personal automobiles were removed from Chesire county – ostensibly by the military – in a period of about 36 hours. What follows is the macabre account of how the citizens of Chesire county came to realize the horror of their plight, and the subsequent demise of a quaint community popular with hikers.
The first reports out of Keene consisted of catatonic individuals lined up in their driveways at about 8:00 AM Eastern Time. The suburban residents stood, keys in hand, at the side of their driveways adjacent to an empty space where SUV’s, Prius’s and Hummers used to park. Other residents lay prone next to where their vehicles used to be. Those who parked in garages were found in similar positions; some had garage doors opened and ready to go.
None of those found displayed any vital signs. Emergency technicians from outside the county attempted to revive both prone and catatonic subjects without success. Officials have yet to release fatality figures, but the size of the tragedy appears to correlate exactly with the number of vehicles removed in the program.
“We’re still gathering data, but obviously it doesn’t look good,” said Special Operative Mac Pound, the sergeant in command of the military deployed here. “I guess they never figured that they would just all die without their cars. I always said those scientists need to get out of the lab a little more often. The idea was the people would find ways to live without their cars, but that obviously wasn’t the case here. I’m sure they’ll get it right sooner or later – they always do.”
Sergeant Pound instructed the media to exit the controlled area and indicated no further public contact would be allowed.

